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The sacking of Sheffield 23-May-2005 At 1:00:15 PM cheesehead

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A trip report of previous reconosance efforts is to follow soon, but there is a host of deffiant skin rending rascals still to be conquered in the UK Peaks district.

I get the feeling Dalai feels somewhat simillar. We're fortunate that we have a double agent onsight. To protect his identity, he shall herein be refered to as Stuck in - er - US.

I'm have not certainty on our window of opportunity, but when the time is right, I propose we launch seige on the Peaks district, and sack Sheffield. Using crafty beta provided by Stuck in US, We shall breach the formidable walls of the Gritstone edges, ensuring we don't become unstuck when they pour boiling oil (usually when cooking chips), nor by the harpie lure of real beer...
When yon walls are passed, We shall storm the city, stopping at every gear store we pass to pillage stupidly cheap rock boots and burn all the half-ropes.
We shall erect the (soon the be created) chockstone standard from the highest wall of yon Foundry climbing wall (also, all climbing walls will be renamed climbing gyms, in accordance with Gods divine will).
Those who wish shall take wives and husbands of the less obstentric of their species. Dental work may be required afore hand however.

We shall be providing better lives for these people should the mission succeed. We shall educate them in the ways of single ropes and bolting stupid/dangerous run outs. We shall crush the barbarian strains of Brit Techno, and reinstate a new rennesaince of European influenced dance beats. We shall then let the nation know that it is part of Europe, Insist that if it is indeed a metric country, it shall no longer measure distance in Miles, and introduce real coffee (though the tea can stay).

Raise bouldering brushes with me all who seek to join this valiant quest!