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General Climbing Discussion

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Best tick after the longest drive 2-Sep-2008 At 9:33:16 AM master of drung

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One day many years ago after a really big night out I awoke early on a sunday morning with the vague idea that I had arranged to go climbing that day. At the time I juggled a job involving early starts and some responsibility with a fearsome thirst for beer and late nights so my body used to go snap! at about 7:30 no matter what amount of abuse it had sustained the night before. My point being don't let this relatively mentally together beginning leave you with the illusion that my condition was anything other than seedy in the extreme. Anyhow my mate rang fairly early and rather than sitting around feeling terrible I allowed myself to be talked into a trip to the werribee gorge. The walk in was more about sweating and not vomiting than walking and we arrived at falcons lookout with me in at least tolerable shape. I don't actually remember but I have a feeling that the first climb of the day was SPQR, my partner at the time was a beginner leader so that would have suited him nicely and there was no way I would have taken the first lead. I assume that I belayed and seconded competantly because somehow a short time later I found myself at the bottom of Golgotha (18ish thrutcharama) telling my mate that I couldn't lead it because I only had one big piece of gear. Golgotha, for those not silly enough to have carried a rack into the werribee gorge, consists of not one but two off width/squeeze chimneyish cracks angled at 90 degrees to each other in a rather imposing corner and not much else, I would have been intimidated by it even if feeling fresh but would probably have had a crack (tee hee). Today I was happy to have an excuse. As luck would have it, the other pair out there that day, heard my plight regarding the lonely hex and immediatley lent me an enormous cam. Again my memory is a little hazy but I assume my resolve crumbled and from that point on my memory becomes a clear. In some ways the climbing isn't too hard, you just sort of wade in stuffing 1/2 of yourself in one side whilst wriggling the rest up the other but god it was hard work. I at least had a plan and not a very stylish one, I would place my hex securely down low which I accomplished then follow the cam up the climb feeling safe if not well. Eels. About 1/2 way up I abandoned this plan not for reasons of style but because the crack was getting slightly wider and the cam a little rattly. Eels. Not to far away I could now see a large and friendly looking chockstone, so I checked the cam and set off. Eels. With the chockstone just out of reach, fighting waves of nausea and both arms stretched deep into either crack, I would not have been surprised to find out that Golgotha is where Jesus died. Eels. Even more so, when I heard the cam fall out and hit the hex far below. I was now in a bit of trouble: a fall had quickly gone from a safe and almost comforting option, to unthinkable. Eels up inside you, finding an entrance where they can. I set my sights on the chockstone and with much difficulty and about 10 excrutiating long minutes, managed to lassoo it with a long sling. I was now safe again and the climb began to not look too bad. Eels. I was within a few metres of the top and the walls either side of the cracks suddenly began to look more featured. With some excitement I forsook the cracks that had simultaneously been my sanctuary and my dungeon and set out confidently for glory on massive jugs. This change of heart was fleeting in the extreme as my body refused to cooperate and sent me plummeting (the chockstone thankfully lived up to my expectations). Still unable to believe that I couldn't climb the veritable ladder between myself and the top I had another go with even less success. It was a bit like that dream where you need to run but can't move, I could see what to do and it was obviously easy but I just couldn't. I finally submitted to feelings of exhaustion beyond the scope of my previous existence and very! slowly aided my way to the top with blurring vision. So no redpoint, I couldn't even do all the moves free, so close and yet so far. I have always said I would go back but I no longer live in Melbourne and werribee gorge no longer looks even remotely desirable as a destination so I guess that is that.