Aahh Mr Capt_mulch you do have a sense of humour!
I did like that one.
Here is a joke-tip from Derek my M10 love if you are catholic and run out of petrol on the way to the Piles this weekend.
Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was out making her rounds visiting homebound patients when she ran out of petrol.
As luck would have it, a petrol station was just a block away.
She walked to the station to borrow a can and buy some petrol.
The attendant told her that the only petrol can he owned had been loaned out, but she could wait until it was returned.
Since Sister Mary Ann was on the way to see a patient, she decided not to wait and walked back to her car.
She looked for something in her car that she could fill with petrol and spotted the bedpan she was taking to the patient.
Always resourceful, Sister Mary Ann carried the bedpan to the station, filled it with petrol, and carried the full bedpan back to her car.
As she was pouring the petrol into her tank, two Baptists watched from across the road.
One of them turned to the other and said, 'If it starts, I'm turning Catholic.'
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