Very good Mr Phil S. I liked the twisty punchline at the end.
With the Christmas party season coming up, Derek my M10 love is going to give up managing a fancy dress company after his experience last year.
On discrimination.
A man with a bald head and a wooden leg is invited to a Xmas fancy dress party.
He doesn't know what to wear to hide his head and his wooden leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain his problem. A few days later he receives a parcel with a note:
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a Pirate's outfit. The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head and with your wooden leg you will be just right as a Pirate.
The man is offended that the outfit emphasizes his disability, so he writes a letter of complaint.. A week passes and he receives another parcel and note:
Dear Sir,
Sorry about the previous parcel. Please find enclosed a monk's habit. The long robe will cover your wooden leg and with your bald head you will really look the part.
The man is really incandescent with rage now, because the company has gone from emphasizing his wooden leg to drawing attention to his bald head. So he writes a really strong letter of complaint..
A few days later he gets a very small parcel from the company with the accompanying letter:
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a tin of Golden Syrup.
We suggest you pour the tin of Golden Syrup over your bald head, let it harden, then stick your wooden leg up your arse and go as a toffee apple.
Yoo hoo Mister Gribble, waving at you madly from over here dearie!
On 23/11/2012 MisterGribble wrote:
>And thank god for Natimuk Glitterati, they crop up just when you need them!
This, of course, is not always the case is it dearie?
Take this other recent example that Derek told me about!
A regional radio station in Vic was holding a competition for their listeners. People had to call in with words that were not listed in the dictionary and if they could use it in a sentence, they would win a prize.
After a couple of uneventful hours and unsuccessful attempts, an old Nati glitterati phones in:
Host; "Yes, caller, you're on the air - state the word and spell it out for us"
Caller; "Yep, the word is 'gaan', spelt g-a-a-n"
Host; "Hmmm, yes my producer has just confirmed that it is not in the dictionary, so if you can use it in a sentence, you will win a prize"
Caller; "Gaan f--- yourself!"
The host immediately disconnects him, becomes flustered and apologises to the listeners for the obscene language.
Anyway, a couple of hours later, there is another call coming through:
Host; "Caller, you're on the air - what's the word and how's it spelt?"
Caller; "Smee, s-m-e-e"
Host; "Yes, I can confirm that 'smee' is not in the dictionary, so if you can use it in a sentence, you will win a prize"
Caller; "Smee again, gaan f--- yourself!"
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